Rockies Pummel Nationals 13-1 in Coors-Sized Beatdown at Nationals Park

The Colorado Rockies brought their thin-air offense to sea level and absolutely demolished the Washington Nationals 13-1 in a laugher that was over before the seventh-inning stretch. This wasn't competitive baseball—this was batting practice with consequences.

Colorado's bats erupted for thirteen runs, turning Nationals Park into their own personal launching pad. The Rockies pounded Washington pitching from the first pitch, building an insurmountable lead while their starter cruised through a Nationals lineup that looked utterly overmatched. Washington managed just one measly run, barely avoiding the shutout indignity.

The Nationals' pitching staff got shelled so badly you'd think they were auditioning for a demolition crew. Every time Colorado came to the plate, it felt like another crooked number was going up on the scoreboard. Meanwhile, Washington's offense was nonexistent—one run against a Rockies pitching staff that typically gives up runs like they're handing out free samples.

DarkHorse stayed quiet on this one, and frankly, who could blame the algorithm? Rockies road games are notoriously tricky to handicap, but Colorado made this look easy. The Nationals are spiraling, and this beatdown won't help their confidence heading into tomorrow. Sometimes baseball just isn't fair—today it was downright cruel to Washington.